I have noticed a few thing with the bwwm (black women white men) groups online that’s poorly affecting this community and that’s part of the reason I decided to write this blog, in hopes that I could bring awareness to these subjects and hopefully turn them around,so this beautiful and wonderful community can continue to grow and thrive even.
Another reason I decided to write this blog is attached to the reasons I just stated, but also so everyone has a better and more full understanding on what’s BlackWhiteConnections is and as the name of the blog says “get the most out of BlackWhiteConnections”.
The first thing I noticed is that the far majority of people out there think or assume that bwwm groups are just “hook up” spots or places to meet someone that your interested in or possibly interested in getting with in some shape or form.
Maybe some of these groups were actually set up with only this intent. I can personally tell you (seeing as I’m the creator and CEO of BlackWhiteConnections, also because I’ve talked to or know many of these bwwm group owners or leaders) that most of these bwwm groups WERE NOT started ONLY for this reason.
Yes it IS a part of the reasons that BlackWhiteConnections as well as many other bwwm groups were started though.
BlackWhiteConnections was started to bring the bwwm community together. To be a family, To offer support and advice, bring everyone together, to have a place where the greater community could find out about the bwwm community. What it is, what are about, what we deal with, and where we are, also so people that are curious or interested in this community can find out about these things and ease into it or jump right in if they decide to do so. It was also started to not just be an online group, but to be a full fledge community. Where we get together both online, as well as offline regularly. That has regular contributors and people that help run it, as well as give back to it. Either in a small way or a major way.
Now that you have a better or more full understanding of what BlackWhiteConnections was started for, let me tell you what BlackWhiteConnections is;BlackWhiteConnections is a bwwm online community.
That means we are all over the internet set up in different groups, fan pages, and profiles on different sites. These are the places we get together online.
Now for the second thing I’ve noticed that’s very negatively affecting the bwwm community online and therefore the greater bwwm community is: guys joining bwwm groups and only being interested in sex and approaching the black women in these groups in sexual ways from the very beginning.
I’m a guy as well so I understand guys wanting sexual gratification, but not from the VERY BEGINNING and with it being the only thing you talk about and how you approach in the first place.
I’m sorry but that’s COMPLETELY ridiculous to me!
How are you gonna not know anything about someone (because most people don’t bother to actually read profiles before they message someone) or very little about them (because most people only post a limited amount of information about themselves online) and approach them with a sexual line, telling them what you want to do to them, telling them how sexy they are and how big their butt is (like they don’t know and haven’t been told a million times already) or asking them if you can do something sexual to them.
The thing that’s even more sad about this is that guys wouldn’t keep doing this if they didn’t get results. With the internet as most things it’s a numbers game and most guys know this! So if they approach enough women this way they know eventually they will get results. So ladies and yes I know it’s far from the majority of you I’m speaking to here, but stop responding to these things and teach these guys how to approach you and on your side this sad thing will stop happening hopefully, because if they don’t get results they won’t continue to do it.
I suggest if a guy approaches you sexually and you don’t want to be ( which is the far majority of you ladies out there I know) then you say “excuse me? I would appreciate it if you don’t talk to me like that. Now if you want to speak to me or get to know me, just say hi or hello”. This will show them you have respect for yourself and how to approach you.
Now guys, really you need to SERIOUSLY step your game up if this is how your approaching females. Ask them some questions about themselves and get to actually know them first before you approach them this way and I guarantee you get much better results. But that doesn’t mean just one or two questions either. Like I said “get to know them some first”.
Now onto the main topic and name of the blog; How to get the most out of BlackWhiteConnections.
Like I said, BlackWhiteConnections is an online community, so my first suggestion on how to get the most out of BlackWhiteConnectioins is to join all of the BlackWhiteConnections community.
That is join all of our groups, fan pages, profiles, chat room, and blogs. That way you will be a part of everything and won’t miss out on anything. Also that way you will have access to many more people than just one of these places. You will have that much more access and opportunity to get what you came for in the first place.
The second suggestion is: regularly check these places and give comments and feed back. Respond to questions and say hi, introducing yourself.
This way more people will see you (because most don’t go through the members sections) and be that much more likely to message you and get to actually know you, which will bring you closer to getting whatever it is you came for in the first place!
Third suggestion on how to get the most from BlackWhiteConnections is:write in questions of your own or think of topics of discussion and write them into the community along with blogs on things facing the bwwm community and that you feel passionately about, so others can respond, get to talking, as well as get to know each other and feel more free to ask questions of their own or leave their thoughts.
Fourth suggestion is: Be an active member and give back by helping run BlackWhiteConnections in your own small or major way. We need help with MANY things and all help is welcome. It doesn’t have to be anything major. In fact most things would take only around an hour a week if that!
Also the people that are the most active and give the most back are the ones that get the most out of anything, much less BlackWhiteConnections. It only makes sense. Think about it. These are the people that everyone sees when they check the various places we are, so it only makes sense that they will be the ones contacted the most and therefore have the larger friends list and in return have the most options to get what they came for in the first place.
If any of you would like to participate helping give back, let me know what you’re interested in doing or how you would like to give back and I’d be more than happy to respond and tell you how you can go about doing this. I can also get you a more full list of specific things needed done.
As always I love you all. Love yourself, love others, and may God bless each and everyone one of you more than your mind can imagine.
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